Saturday, January 21, 2012

Things You Can't Do When You're Married

... according to some tweeters.



Once you get married, you can't...

...dance like a stripper.

...expect anymore flowers on your birthday. Unless those cauliflowers came free with the $10 purchase of beansprouts.

...squeeze the toothpaste from the middle of the tube. That makes them mad.

...get marital advice from your single friends.

...get mad everytime there's a problem. Y'all gotta learn how to compromise and work thru it.

...flash people during a traffic jam. 

...stop doing everything you used to do. Too many relationships end because people stop doing sweet things.

...eat a whole pint of ice cream on the couch in your underwear... or can you?

...sleep in the middle of the bed no more.

...check out the caboose on another lady walking by. It gets you hit in the head with a newspaper, or so I've seen.

...cheat from your nose down.

 ...live with your momma

...can't keep those naked photos of ur ex.

...use daddy's American Express anymore.





Note: Because I don't want to get sued, I didn't add the tweeters' names here. They will stay anonymous, thank you.

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